The Simple Things
by silentmuse24
Summary: Set after the events of Kill Ari Part I/II . Abby's real thoughts after she is left alone to deal with the loss of Agent Kate Todd, hints of Abby/Kate one-shot. FEED THE BARD!


**Disclaimer:** Not mine!!

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**A/N:** Okay, so I have to admit, after watching the first two seasons of NCIS nonstop I have fallen in love with the idea of Abby/Kate and I was tortured by Kate's sudden death and sooo yeah, this is in awesome memory of what could have been between the two, hope you enjoy, please remember to be kind and review me!! Thanks!!

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**1.**

I bid Duckie good night as I had him drop me off in front of my apartment complex, but as he took off, I paused near the entrance and waited patiently for his car to turn the corner before I walked down the steps briskly in my heels from the outfit I'd worn to the funeral and began marking my way across the street and up about five blocks, thankful that the rain had let up since my umbrella wasn't exactly the kind to sport a downpour. Then again, I'd welcome the rain about now, it fit my mood perfectly. I headed up the elevator to the top floor of the old brick building, passing by a few residents here and there, before stopping in front of the door marked 5B. I breathed in deeply as I pulled out the copied brass key, pressed it into the lock and with a twist the door opened.

Just as it had been nearly a week ago since I'd last been in it, untouched, still perfectly lived in, yet, the only change was the darkness, I flicked the switch on the wall and the overhead lights turned on into the small, one-bedroom apartment and noticed that Kate's never-ending stack of mail was still laying haphazardly in a pile next to the door on the small cubby, I placed my keys down beside it and locked the door behind me. It was so quiet, _serene_ as Kate always loved to put it, there were still a few dishes left to be washed, a cereal bowl, no doubt from the last time Kate had eaten in her apartment before...

"You're welcome to sell it, y'know,"my tear-streaked face followed the sound of the hollowed, yet familiar voice and my eyes landed on Kate. I smiled, weakly, her vision was still so clear, I remembered every detail of the way her hair fell around her face, framing its heart-shape, the way her full lips quirked up a little higher on the left, into a beautiful smirk with a dimple and her eyes... So expressive.

"I can't do that, Kate,"I whispered, my voice hoarse, raw from crying so much these past few days.

Kate walked over to me and despite wearing heels herself, they made no sound against the woodgrain floor as she came to me and tried to wrap her arms around my waist. No matter how real the vision, I felt nothing, I merely stood there, trying to retain my calm as I fought for control over my emotions.

"I can't do that, this place is ours.. its yours and mine- and-"

"And you probably wont be able to find much courage to set foot in here but maybe oh, never again?"Kate retorted knowingly, stepping back, I stared at her reflection, her ghost as I could only think of calling it. Wearing her comfortable jeans, and a beautiful black v-neck sweater that I always loved on her figure. The necklace I'd given her, and placed in her coffin, hung loose around her neck. Her near-golden eyes pierced through me. "Abby, sweetheart, you need to just get what you can, give my mother what she'd asked for and then keep the rest and let someone else have the apartment, its just a space-"

"But it was _our_ space, Kate,"I cried. I collapsed into the leather couch that she and I had one of our first arguments about placing in the apartment but I won out in the end when she realized how comfortable it truly was. "This was our home, our secret spot where we could be _us_, away from Gibbs and Tony and NCIS, it was just you and me,"tears poured endlessly and I wiped my nose on my sleeve.

"Don't cry, baby, you know I hate that,"Kate handed me a tissue, I blew into it. "Abby, I'm not saying to forget what we had, I'm just saying make it easier on yourself, let go a little."

"But.. I don't _want to_, I don't want to forget you, I don't want to forget anything, I want to remember every detail, and I want to curse it all to Hell for every spare moment I had that I never took advantage of!"I cried, and Kate tried to help me lay down along the couch, I complied as she lay next to me on the outside, we were close, a hairsbreath away, but not touching. I just cried and Kate waited patiently for it to all pass. "If I let you go, Kate, even the smallest part... I'll start to forget, I'll begin forgetting how beautiful the sunrise was in your hair, or how your voice seemed to pitch whenever you were excited about something, or how much love I could see in your eyes whenever you looked at me, even at work, it was always there, I don't want to forget the little things, the simple things,"I sniffled.

"Abby, I'm gone now, nothing, no one, no how will ever change that, but you have your life ahead, I can't move forward anymore, but you can, I'll always be here, loving you the same as I have since I first met you,"Kate placed her hand over my heart, and though I felt nothing from her, my heart began racing at the familiar gesture. "You're apart of me, and I'll never be truly gone. Because I'm always going to be right here,"she whispered. I almost swore I could feel that minty whisp of air from her lips. I wanted so bad to be able to just lean forward and capture them, feel their soft, plush taste melt against my own, have her kiss away my doubts, my fears, all my worries and wake up in the warmth of her embrace, have this whole past week just be a nightmare.

"I can't do it, Kate, I can't.. I love you,"I whispered, choking up. "I want to be with you, I don't wanna move forward, I don't want to grow old, I don't want new memories, not without you being apart of them."

"You can, Abby, you have to... I don't want to see you hurt anymore, this hurts me, whether you believe in my illusion or not, it hurts to see you all in such pain over me, I wish that there was someway to make the hurt stop, but I can't, I can only watch on and wait for time to heal it, and that _hurts_ most of all, I need you to do this for me, Abby, I need you to be strong and live, be happy and have fun again, please, for me,"Kate's voice hitched, I knew she wanted to cry, but as always, Kate would never cry, she'd be stubborn about it and wait til everyone else was gone. "For me?"she looked at me, her jaw set firmly.

"Don't leave me, Kate,"I cried. "Please, I can't do this alone.."

"You're not alone, Abby, you have McGee, Tony, Duckie and Gibbs, they're there for you, they hurt, too, you'll all make it past this somehow,"Kate said.

"But you-"

"Shush,"and Kate leaned forward, the distance closing, and I clamped my eyes shut, trying, demanding my body to feel something, _anything, _but the kiss was nothing more than a wicked illusion of my mind, trying desperately to play tricks on me, to help me heal through this hurt.

"Remember that time you took me out to the rave?"Kate asked me. I had to scramble my mind for a moment to recall, since I'd been to many raves, and then I almost laughed, almost.

"Of course, it was our first date,"I responded, dense.

"And remember how we ran into your ex-girlfriend, Natasha or whoever?"

"You were so jealous, I thought I saw flames coming out of your ears-"

"I was not!"Kate huffed. I laughed then at her stubbornness.

"Were too!"

"Was not!"

"Back to point... I was a _little_ jealous, because of your history.. "

"Kate-"

"Let me finish, Abs,"Kate held up a finger, and then took a deep breath. "You remember what happened?" My eyebrows knitted together in confusion, that night was mostly a blur, so long ago...

"I recall a couple drinks and then, Natasha talking me into a dance while you went to the restroom.."

"And?"Kate badgered.

"And then she tried to stick her tongue down my throat,"I recalled, shuddering visibly. "But then I pushed her away and followed you right out the door where you had stalked over to the car and demanded I take you home."

"D'you remember what you told me that night?"Kate asked.

"You look really hot in leather?"I tried. Kate laughed.

"Fast forward a bit there, sweetie,"she tried again. I recalled the blonde hometown girl I'd known forcing herself on me, seeing Kate upset, then running after her.

"Kate, my heart beats for you,"I recalled the cheesy line that was the honest truth.

"Your heart beats for me, and though I thought you were just drunk out of your mind, your eyes made me believe you,"Kate whispered, a smile gracing her beautiful face. "Your heart beats for me now, Abby, and as long as you keep that in mind, you'll make it through, I need you to stick to that statement, and remember that when you're in pain, I'll always be right here when you need me."

"I love you, Kate,"my voice cracked. "I know you're trying, but.. its not making it any easier to let you go-"

"I know, baby,"Kate whispered and ran her fingers through my hair, I scowled.

"I wanna feel you again, touch you, kiss you,"my heart broke. "Kate.. please-"

"We'll be together again, Abby, but now, I need your heart to beat for me, promise me?"Kate asked gently. I was silent. "Abbie,"she protested my thoughts, as I looked over to the counter where the scissors lay next to a stack of coupons.

"I swear, Caitlin,"I knew she hated it when I used her full name, but how else could I convince her, or myself?

"Thank you,"Kate kissed me again, I tried to kiss back. "I love you, Abbie, I always have, I'm so sorry for hurting you like this."

"Pain is a common factor in this goth's life,"I tried to joke, but my eyes still leaked a few tears. I was certain my mascara had run dry and I probably looked horrid. Featherlight kisses, as Kate called them, she presseed to my brow, my eyes, my nose, my cheeks, and my lips.

"Sleep now, tommorow you'll wake up and you'll learn that you _can_ move forward,"Kate told me.

"Will you stay? Just for tonight?"I asked, gently. Kate smiled, then nodded, I closed my eyes, and began to softly feel my exhaustion from the emotional whirlwind take over my body. Before unconsciousness stole me away, I could swear I almost felt a real kiss press down upon my lips and I smiled as I heard Kate's gentle voice.

"You may not see me again, Abby, but I'll always be with you, always."

The suns rays beat down on my raw eyelids as I peeked open with the sun coming up into our shared apartment. However, I was no longer on the sofa, shock took over my body as I jerked up in our bed, and I reached for her side, but realized with heartbreaking agony that it was empty, I turned my head away to cry when I felt something unusual beneath the pillow. I looked over and noticed a folded note, opening it, I had to choke back my tears at her familiar loopy scrawl.

_Abby,_

_I came to a realization as I watched you sleep last night... I love you._

_So very much, of this I am sure. Don't ever doubt that even when I am_

_not around you, I am thinking about you and wherever you are, is where_

_I want to be. We'll be together for as long as you'll have me._

_My heart beats for you now._

_Always,_

_~Kate_.

I sniffled, as I realized this must have been here for a while, we'd been together for almost sixteen months before she died, and I knew that she loved me for the longest time, I reminded her daily. I sighed and held the crumpled paper to my chest, feeling my spirit brighten with the rise of the sun in the cramped little bedroom.

"Thank you, Kate,"I whispered. And even though I did not see her, I could swear I heard her say to me,

_"I'll always be with you, always"_

**xFINx**

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**AN**: Liked it? Loved it? Hated it? LET ME KNOW!!! please review! thank you!


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